Category Archives: Grand-Pappy Stolts

Grand-Pappy Stolt’s Nearly Famous Review in 5 Words: The Black Keys Edition

Grand-Pappy Stolts caught wind about those young fellas from Ohier that took his old blues music and tried to turn into something of an electronic ruckus. He didn’t take to kindly to that notion, but he figured he’d give it the good ole’ college try anyway. So he cained and hobbled on down to the Five’N’Dime, coughed up some spare silver dollars and pennies from his piggy bank, and bought himself the record. Here is what he had to say

Grand-Pappy Stolt’s Nearly Famous Review in 5 Words: Kanye West Edition

Grand-Pappy Stolts was a bit sore because he couldn’t attend the Kanye/Jay-Z show with Wes and I last weekend.  There was a dual excuse for the old man’s absence.  First, Grand-Pappy has a mortal fear of black people.  Ever since the civil rights movement, the old battleaxe has harbored a belief that large groups of minorities are “up to no good rabblerousers”.  Second, Grand-Pappy was certain he would fall down the “dangerously steep stairs and crack a hip”. Either way,

Grand-Pappy Stolts’ Nearly World Famous 5 Word Review: James Brown Edition

Once grand-pappy Stolts saw we voted James Brown: Live at the Apollo our #1 live album, he was chompin’ at the bit to give his two-cents since he was actually AT THE SHOW! He was the creepy guy lifting ladies skirts during “Sex Machine” (and every other song for that matter). So without further ado, here it is everyone, Grand-pappy Stolts’ 2nd ever, 5-word review …….. The Album: James Brown: Live at the Apollo